Geez, what a morning. As the well rounded person that I am, I do socialize with Highlander fans and some are even close friends, so this morning my phone has been ringing a lot and my usual quiet ferry ride to Manhattan was disturbed by irate Highlander fans who hate their managers’ guts.

I was under the assumption that the manager of the Highlanders was named “Joe” Girardi but my Highlander buddies keep calling him “Fuckin’” Girardi, oh well. I’m just a sounding board for these folks, the same ones who find pleasure in breaking my balls as the Mets let season after season go down the drain. But in time of Highlander misery they reach out to me because they know they can’t help each other as Highlander fans are incapable of compassion and understanding but know Mets fans are the salt of the earth of baseball fans.

Do I turn my back on these fine folks? Of course not, it goes against my Mets fan nature and besides some of these fine Highlander fan folk are very handy with hammers and know how to run electrical wires, two things I’m clueless about, so as payment for my time, I will get two light fixtures installed in my home.   

I tell them how right they are that the Highlanders are facing three opponents, the Angels, the umpires and Joe “Fuckin’” Girardi. Then after they vent, I soothe them with gushing praise for Jeter and Mariano and talk about Alex Rodriguez’ becoming “clutch”,the more I say A-Rod’s clutch, the weeping subsides. I then go on about the Big Stallion, CC Sabathia going today (I don’t mention the 3 days rest because I don’t want the boo-hooing starting up again) and then I go to the tough love mode as I shout to them “COM’ON YOU’RE THE HIGHLANDERS GOD DAMNIT, YOU WILL RISE ABOVE THIS AND WIN THE SERIES” and off they go,  happy and confident and appreciative of their Mets fan buddy’s support. What they don’t know is, I’m downloading pictures of Howie Kendrick to hang up on my cubicle wall.

Speaking of Highlander fans, Lisa Swan, the Highlander half of Subway Squawkers included yours truly in a piece she wrote for The Faster Times asking Mets bloggers about our thoughts on a Highlander-Phuck Phace World Series.  I thank Lisa for including me in this piece.

Mike Silva writes about Scott Boras talking Texieria money for Matt Holliday. Here’s a surprise, Holliday would love to play for either NY team but leans more Highlander than Mets. What a shock (eyeroll) here’s a little advice for Mr. Holliday, you see how those fine folks in St Lou reacted to you misplaying that fly ball ? That doesn’t happen here. If you were a Met, it would be more you wearing sirloin underwear and we’re a bunch of starving Rottweilers. Do yourself a favor Matt, stay in the Midwest.

Rick Peterson is being fitted for a new Jacket with the Brew Crew. Good luck Rick and good luck Brewski fans with your Rick Peterson Decoder Rings.

Someone at Stub Hub is going to rot in hell for eternity, and rightfully so.

Jayson Stark had to have typed this story on last night Phuck Phace-Hollywood Bums game with his nose, as his hands were busy doing something else. Pull your pants up Jayson.

Stop listening to the Minister of Mis-Information Omar Minaya. Jose Reyes, Carlos Beltran, Carlos Delgado, John Maine and J J Putz are NOT COMING BACK THIS SEASON!!!!!!! For some reason Omar hasn’t gotten it through his head that all the talk of the injured has been undermining this team for the past month. While it’s not just Omar’s fault, J-Man was the early culprit in this stupid “Hold the fort until they get back” losers mentality but he finally figured out how unproductive that attitude was. Now add D-Wright to those slow learners that this “blame it on the injuries” lament is for losers which is what the Mets are right now.

Instead of Minaya spewing his bullshit on SNY and in the press he should be sitting down and figuring out how much of the deadwood on the player development side will be thrown out for salvage come the end of the season.

I hope you all have come to the realization that this season is kaput. The time now is to turn to who in the farm system is worth promotion to either see how they fit here in 2010 for to let them strut their stuff and entice other organizations to talk trade.

But the biggest movement here will be clearing out the front office. The only thing that will save Omar’ ass is the Skill Sets will in no way shape or form fire him and pay him to lay on the beach in the D.R. but at some point the Skill Sets may have to think of finding a baseball executive that Omar would report to.

Freddy Skill Sets realized a few years ago that he sucks as a baseball man but he didn’t have the heart to tell his little boy Jeffey that he wasn’t a baseball man either. The time has come for Freddy to have a heart to heart with the little shit and give him a dose of tough love that it’s time for Jeffey to stay out of the baseball business. That’s not to say that all contract and money spent won’t go through Jeffey as he is the owner and he is in charge of the money being spent (you think he gives his daddy grief about Freddy’s good buddy Bernie Madoff ?) but this off season I don’t want to hear that Jeffey is wining and dining free agent and calling agents and stalking Omar about personnel moves. The Mets need a President of Baseball Operations to run the entire spectrum of player personnel, pro and minor league along with amateur scouting. If Omar has a problem with that then let him resign and leave the money behind. I doubt that he would do that and as I stated the Mets won’t fire him so hiring a boss for him is the next logical step. The first name that comes to mind is Sandy Alderson who left the Padres earlier this year. Gene Michael would be another great choice and with the Bronx Robber Barron out of the picture maybe a substantial raise would lure him one boro over. Buck Showalter would be controversial and maybe not a fan favorite but his track record shows he can build a team and maybe it’s time for guy to rattle the cages in Queens. Could Andy MacPhail be fed up with Peter Angelos and come to NY to carry on the MacPhail NY baseball family legacy ?

The bottom line is it’s time to take the keys away from Omar and put Jeffey in the corner and bring in a Baseball CEO to save the franchise.

Gotta love Tony Bernazard the man has a way with words, especially when it come to the Mets catching situation and bringing in Pudge Rodriguez:

Some of us wished we could have him (Rodriguez) with us, but the truth is that we have two catchers under contract,” Bernazard told El Nuevo Dia. “It’s not so easy to make a move right now to make it possible to have him with us.”

This goes more to Ramon Castro than to Brain Schneider as the word is the Mets feel that Castro is an underachieving lump of shit who finds excuse after excuse to not step up when he’s needed.

The Mets look to have taken a more tough love approach this spring to see how the players in the cross hairs would react. Gimp Castillo was the first as he was shopped around more than a ‘ho on the Hunts Point stroll. He has responded so far this spring with a better work ethic and attitude. Ryan Church was next to given a shove by Warlord Jerry and he has taken it and used it to his advantage.  Duaner Sanchez was the first casualty of the tough love and was given severance pay and a well deserved kick to the curb.

Now come the catchers who if they have been paying attention realize the front office isn’t joking about making players accountable and have been told bluntly that the only reason your two sorry ass’s are here is no one else wants you and we wish we could dump you off and sign a has been, performance enhancing broken down catcher who even in that state of decline is better than you two.

Now let’s see how Shrek/Schienderhandled this diss down.